I’m not gone cry

I’m not gone cry

“While all the time that I was loving you, you were busy loving yourself I would stop breathing if you told me to, now you’re busy loving someone else..” As the song starts I can remember seeing the film (Waiting to Exhale) in the theater for the first time ever, it was in the old Cheltenham Mall theater. It was so crowded every seat in the place was taken, all anyone could see was a sea of woman filling the entire place. There may have been about ten or so males in there that evening. I sat in a row with about eight other females, we had all came to see this movie together. When the part in the film came on where this song (Not Gone Cry by Mary J Bliege) lowly played in the background every single female in the place started to sing this song, my entire body was covered with goose bumps as I sang the song as well. It was one of the most amazing things that I to this day have ever experienced, with lord knows how many other people, 75 or 100 who knows. But the sound of all of us sining in agreement, with feeling, the sound was just amazing. Now that several years have passed, I’ve lived more than enough experiences where I can actually understand the words, feelings, and emotions behind this song, that scene in the movie and why so many of us that night felt the need to sing this song.

“I should have left your ass long time ago, I’m not gone cry, I’m not gone cry, I’m not gone shed no tears because you’re not worth my tears. I was your lover and your secretary working every day of the week was at the job when no one else was there helping you get on your feet..” I mean even though many of us weren’t married and probably like myself still have yet to get married, this song speaks to the heart of every woman (man) hurt, putting yourself out for someone else just having them play with your heart just to leave you for another person. I mean the song talks about how easily someone can just leave you after an extended amount of time together basically without regard to the commitment in which the two of you had made to one another, or the emotional attachment. “ eleven years I’ve sacrificed and you can leave me at the drop of a dime...” This also leaves a person feeling as if the time they’ve put into a relationship was wasted in essence it may feel like that, there is no positive way to put a spin on that. However every personal experience with another human being is an opportunity to learn something that you can use later on in your lifetime. I mean life’s lessons aren’t always so easy and none messy, there is going to be difficulty, there is going to be a lot of mess to clean up, there’s going to be complications involved with them. But they aren’t for naut and if you’re a quick learner you may not have to repeat them ever again, because you would have gotten out of that relationship or situation what you needed to avoid ever being put in that place ever again.

I just only wish that people would no longer have to learn these lessons that end with so much pain, but as long as there are “assholes” in this world there is going to be pain inflicted to anyone who let’s someone into their hearts, anyone who opens up their lives and lets another person into it. Until this day there are always going to be songs written like this or movies like “Waiting To Exhale”, dedicated to the pain that so many people male and female have been through and sad to say real life doesn’t always have the movie happy endings in them either.